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"Oh, My God, I could,ve had a V8!!"

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Mr. Martin, we here at Clear Channel are sick of your cockamamie ideas, so we've...ummm...consolidated your family to a plot six feet under.

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MY BALLS ITCH. NO....REALLY, THIS ISN'T A CAPTION....I JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW THAT MY BALLS REALLY ITCH.

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Don't tell me Mel Karmazin's not my father....I know he is!!

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That's the last time I use Old Spice aftershave. That crap burns!

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I think I do a good impression of Jim Carrey you dickhead.

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Oh no Sean Phillips is my new PD!!!!!!!!!!!

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Oh shit- we just got sold to Clear Channel?

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Red team Go!!! Red Team Go!!!

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Screw service elements...I'm working weekends to become a STAR!!!

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Whatda ya mean the worst Gary Owens you ever saw? Fuck you man!

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whats the deal? haven't you ever seen a siamese hand before? Jeremy Grego, Pruett, and The Boner

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You left your underwear in the bed? How could you be so stupid. I told you my wife was coming in from New York this afternoon.

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Ya didn't have to slap me! Like you've never heard you've got an ass cute enough for corn-holin'!

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Britney has a greatest hit cd coming out, what store, I have got to go get it

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"Hey, Mick Jagger, how do you feel after plastic surgery?"

"My wrinkles! They're all gone!" (another quality caption from Mike Bratton, writing quality captions since 1999.)

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hey gang, my wacky sidekick superglued his hand to his face..that nutty goatboy..ellis

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i swear, i thought she was eighteen!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Another morning show gets the "shocking news" from Clear Channel that they've been canned.

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How can ELLEN K of lost?

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